Filmkritik: X-Men First Class Review (aka Magneto Origins)

Disclaimer: “Filmkritik” is German for, “movie review.”

Wait….what?  Magneto Origins?  Well you see, before X-Men First Class got green lit, Magneto was set to star in his own origin story, just like Wolverine did a few years ago.  Thankfully though, that ended up not happening.  Unless, that is, this type of movie is your cup of tea….

Oh gosh...make it stop. Please.....make it stop....

Rest easy though.  X-Men First Class was infinitely better than the Wolverine Origin movie.  Then again, so was Mr. Popes de Galla Saves the Pyramids…

Ok fine...not an actual movie....but still would've been better than Wolverine. And that's saying something considering said hypothetical movie "Mr. Popes de Galla Saves the Pyramids" is a terrible, terrible film...

The Good:

* McAvoy as Professor X and Fassbender as Magneto.  These two literally made the film. MADE it. In the original X films, Professor X was just kind of….boring.  But in First Class, his powers are on full display and are just flat out cool. In regards to Fassbender…assuming a sequel’s gonna take place…I’m already crowning his future performance the best super villain portrayal of all time.  He’s just that good.

* Cameos.  One I think you’ll recognize, one you probably won’t.  But don’t be on the lookout for Stan Lee.  He wasn’t in this one, which if you ask me is completely ridiculous.

* Tie ins to the original films.  Not everything lines up perfectly, but for the most part they did a fantastic job of making it go hand in hand in with the originals while still making the film a reboot of the franchise.  Typically you either get one or the other….not both.  So that was neat.  Unfortunately, a reboot wouldn’t even have been necessary had Bret Ratner stayed at home and not ruin the franchise with X3.

You. Suck.

The Bad:

* This movie was put on the fast track and completed in about a year.  Post production needed much longer though.  The CGI felt completely outdated.  Effects from the much lower budgeted X-Men film had more believable effects…and that was from 10 YEARS ago.  Ouch.

* First Class was set up to be somewhat like a James Bond film.  Unfortunately, some “campy” villains  were the result….much like the older Bond films from the 90s.  It also didn’t help that two of the “henchmen” for the main villain, Sebastian Shaw, both had the exact same greasy, long, slicked back hair.  HUUUGE pet peeve.  That just bugged me to no end.  And Emma Frost?  She me be stunning looking, but her acting rivals that of little Anakin from Star Wars Episode I.  Ironically, as I’m writing this review, The Dave Ryan Show (radio) here in Minnesota just mentioned that January Jones (the actress who played Emma Frost) was voted the most least liked actress in Hollywood.  Still though, if I’m her, I’m more offended that my acting was compared to little Anakin Skywalker on some random blog that no one reads.  Up in arms…

Poor Jake Lloyd. Run out of Hollywood upon release of TPM. You think I'm joking....?

* I didn’t want to be bored during the film…I really didn’t….but I was.  There were pacing issues and plenty of stretches of time that had long lulls in action or anything that was…well, interesting.  Most Sebastian Shaw scenes fell flat.

* Everything you saw in the trailers and previews?  Yeah….you literally saw most of the cool stuff in the movie.  I was hoping that wasn’t the case….but it was.  Absolutely absurd.  One of the TV spots even reveals a major turning point of the film.  Big *face palm* for the people put in charge of splicing together the previews.

* Nothing after the credits.  Don’t waste your time.

* Poor Beast couldn’t even move his mouth when he talked.  And the one time he could, it was done with CGI.  I couldn’t help but feel Beast simply looked like a guy in a gorilla suit that was painted blue.  I didn’t feel that way with Kelsey Grammer’s Beast from X3…even though that one was technically just a blue gorilla suit as well…

* I have a huge problem with the fact that Charles Xavier went looking for mutants to recruit for a dangerous government mission…and all of them turned out to be teenagers.  Out of ALL of the mutants he found with the Cerebro machine….he recruited FOUR TEENAGERS (in addition to teenagers Beast and Mystique, who were already on board).  Little things like that just bother me.  What, is this Power Rangers?

Five teenagers to rule them ALL1!!!!11!!!

So there you have it….more bad than good….but is it a bad film?  Certainly not.  Was it a great film?  Certainly not.  It was simply just a good, entertaining (but at times lulling) film.  Don’t let the high praising critics fool you (*cough* the Fox funded*cough*).  This is no master piece, and certainly does not rival The Dark Knight for best comic book movie of all time.  In terms of where it ranks amongst X-Men Films…

1) X2

2) X-Men

3) X-Men First Class

4) X3

5) Wolverine doesn’t deserve this spot.  Instead, we will give the last ranking spot to “Australia”.

A better X-Men movie than Wolverine...despite there not being any X-Men.


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